2. The best feedback I got from last time was to start my pitch with a hook rather than just jumping into my speech. Implementing a statistic helps grab my listener's attention for the rest of the pitch. I thought the most outrageous comment was the one where someone said banning vaping is not the solution. I am not banning vaping, simply helping people kick their habit to the curb. The most useful feedback I got was when someone said I seemed passionate about my topic and spoke well about it.
3. Based on the feedback, I added a statistic on vaping related illnesses and deaths in the last 6 months to the beginning of my pitch. I also made it more clear as to what my company does and how we will work with both the customer and other businesses to provide services and make money, all while getting rid of young adult's nicotine addictions.
Hello Christopher,
ReplyDeleteI liked your pitch a lot. I suggest rounding off your statistics if possible (e.g. 1,479 to about 1500); I think it would make it easier to follow and remember.
Another thing that I liked was your flow of your points, though it may be a little fast for some. Reduce words and add more pauses to allow people to soak in/reflect what you said. For example, you could omit "so as my company stated before", and go straight to "We are here to take the JUUL..." but have a pause b/w your statement about Trump's ban on flavored vapes and your plan.
Also, I thought your choice of attire was smart as it demonstrates familiarity to other college students (whether you did that on purpose or not haha).
Hi Christopher,
ReplyDeleteI think you did a really good job here. The aspect I liked the most is that you did a very thorough job explaining exactly what your company does without overcomplicating it. I feel I have a clear understanding of exactly what you are trying to do, why you re ding, and how you plan to grow. I would maybe wear something a little more formal. Other than that great job.